"i will accept you if you are a prep, ugly, fat, beautiful, gay, lesbian, bisexual, weird, a loser, a nerd, a freak; it doesnt matter, because who am i to judge, its you, and im me."

Created in the Polyvore iPhone app. http://www.polyvore.com/iPhone

story up tomorrow! soooo sorry haven't been super active lately. will be much more soon.

[collab with @peaceloveglitter!]
 
SATURDAY 5
To all those singles out there, you're invited to a photo-shoot with lots of male-models of course. There's also a little party taking place with champagne and traditional Swedish appetizers.
 
I stepped out of the elevator and into the photoshoot room.
 
“Sorry I’m late guys, ballet sort of dragged on!” I called out to anyone who was listening.
 
A woman with a Bluetooth and clipboard walked over to me with a blue dress on a hanger. A tan jacket was hanging over it. “Put this on, darling.” She shoved the dress at me.
 
I smiled and took it and looked around for the dressing room. I saw Layla near a fold-out partition, where I assumed we would be changing.
 
“Hey girl!” I said to her. She was already in her dress, looking all cute.
 
“This is so exciting!” She said.
 
As soon as I nodded, some shirtless, tan guy walked past us, clearly checking her out.
 
“Oooooh!” I squealed.
 
She chuckled. “He’s a cutie, I guess. I have my eyes on someone else, however.”
 
She looked over my shoulder and gestured towards someone else. I discreetly turned around, pretending to be looking at the girls behind him, and snuck a look at who she was talking about.
 
Tall, handsome, and holding a large camera.
 
“The photographer?”
 
“Bingo.” She smiled.
 
The woman with the clipboard sauntered over to me again. “Change, now. Please.” Her voice sounded urgent.
 
I laughed. “Okay, guess its work time.”
 
Layla was already wandering over toward the photographer.
 
I changed behind the partition, had some shoes and jewelry assigned to me, and began the photo shoot. I got partnered with this lovely man with dark hair and toned muscles. He reminded me of one of my ballet partners a few years ago.
 
After the shoot, there was a cute little party. I sipped on a flute of champagne and talked to Amelie and Jamie, but in the corner of my eye saw Layla flirting with the photographer. Jamie was telling us about her mysterious midnight kiss on NYE.
 
For some reason, though, I couldn’t stop thinking about Thom. Why, though? He had always been such a jerk to me. It seemed, though, he was getting sweeter. I quickly shook out the next idea that came to my head.
 
Focus on the hot models here, I told myself.

so kinda a lame and short story haha. sorrehhh
 
THURSDAY 3
To start off the year, you're invited to a sleepover. It's all about movies, music, and alcohol of course!
 
I took a swig of the Jack Daniels bottle and passed it to Layla, who was on my left. She was in the middle of telling all about what happened after midnight on NYE.
 
NYE had mainly been a drunken blur. I barely remember any of what happened after I returned to the dance floor.
 
I drowsily got up off the floor and headed for the snacks.
 
“Bring me some M&M’s!” Andie called out.
 
I brought them back, plus some marshmallows and pretzels. Ahh. I missed sleepovers from my high school days. Tonight was simply a girls night. Ballet would be a late and short practice tomorrow, so I didn’t have to worry about that; Thom hadn’t bothered me since NYE, and so I didn’t have to worry about that either.
 
All I had to do was relax, drink, and eat some marshmallows. I popped a fluffy one into my mouth and let it dissolve. Melt-in-your-mouth and roll-your-eyes-back kind of good.
 
It was party time!

STORY UP!
 
included: @ingrid, @jolieenrose, @elaineeeee, @peaceloveglitter, @thunder-dollfaycee
 
MONDAY 31
New Years is hours away! There is a masquerade ball taking place at the Nobis Hotel and we're all invited. This will be Stockholm's biggest and final event of the year!
 
I slicked on my red lipstick one last time and exited the taxi, dropping me off in front of the Nobis Hotel. I arrived dateless, but excited nevertheless. I smiled as I saw Devon and Katniss chatting just outside the doors, and joined them.
 
“Hello, darlings!” I gave them both a hug.
 
“Love your mask!” Devon said, while putting on her own.
 
“Meow,” I laughed. “But just look at that dress! Breathtaking.”
 
Devon curtsied. “Fresh off the runway! I wore it recently in a show and just had to get one for myself.”
 
“Shall we, ladies?” Katniss said, ushering us towards the door.
 
“Definitely!” I nodded.
 
As the shiny glass doors of Nobis Hotel swung open, a blast of music and an intense alcohol-like smell came rushing towards us. We all smiled and headed in.
 
Katniss pointed out Amelie, Layla and Anya dancing in the middle of a large group and we joined them.
 
“This is fun!” Layla called out over a sea of music and voices.
 
“I haven’t danced like this in forever.” Amelie said. She was clearly having a blast. We all were!
 
“Anyone want a drink?” Anya asked the group, looking around. Multiple girls, including myself, nodded. It was New Years Eve, and this would not be my first of the night.
 
Each of the girls soon found a guy and floated off with him, either dancing, talking, or getting more to drink.
 
Soon, some tall, light-haired man approached me.
 
“A dance?” A smile appeared under his navy blue mask. “You look so beautiful tonight, and I know you like dancing.”
 
Most people in Stockholm knew me from the theatre, so I wasn’t surprised. I began to dance with him, and he began to get closer and closer to me, until I could taste the vodka in his breath. His arms swung around me and he held me tight, as if we were one.
 
It was a little weird. I had just met him. But hey, it was New Years Eve. Just roll with it.
 
“What’s your name?” I looked up at him and shouted.
 
He responded, but I could barely hear him over blaring music, which, at this moment, was Thinkin Bout You by Frank Ocean.
“What? John?”
 
He smiled and repeated his name again, “Thom.”
 
My jaw dropped. I felt disgusted. I thought that maybe, just maybe, I could have someone for once.
 
I ripped his arms off and walked away, in search of finding Amelie or Layla or anyone.
 
I felt his hand on my shoulder spin me around to face him.
 
“I’m not going to be just another one of your girls. Other ballerinas may sleep with you and whatever, but that’s not going to be me.” I sucked in a deep breath. “If that means I don’t get the bigger parts in upcoming shows, so be it.”
 
I walked away again, but couldn’t find any of my friends. I did find a little lounge room, however, where I sat down in a big cushy chair and tried to melt away. I could tell my dress was getting squished and wrinkled, but I tried to let go. There was a couple in the room, making out on a couch, which made me feel pretty uncomfortable.
 
After a while of sitting and decompressing, I checked the time. 11:46. AKA time to stop being down on myself about something I should have expected, and time to start reminding myself why I came here: to have fun.
 
I lifted myself out of the chair and headed back for the dance floor, a smile pasted on my face.

@paula-v @anahelenaliveshere @thunder-dollfaycee @irtis @peaceloveglitter @elaineeeee @this-little-babydoll @jolieenrose @followyourbliss @emilie-ethereal @petit-lapin @vintage-angel @ingrid @the-clary-project @elizabeth-kate @rockets-and-rainbows @priscilla @young-grasshopper @henna-enjoys-the-little-things
 
SO sorry this is extremely late! ive been crazy busy. its an important story, though, so please read! and let me know if you dont want to be tagged when I put in a late story. thanks!
 
introducing thom this story, who is her ballet coach/teacher. His bio:
 
Thom Kassel | 31 | Black Swan
Known for his excellent ballet, Thom teaches to only the best in Stockholm and runs an exclusive studio with tough competition. Rumor has it he often takes advantage of his dancers, sexually, and places his favorites in lead roles. His sexy British accent can make any ballerina swoon.
Model: Joseph Morgan
 
+++
 
SUNDAY 30
All of us are headed downtown for Stockholm's annual dance show to celebrate a new year.
 
“Nina get your butt on the stage!”
 
I touched up my hair one last time and pranced out. My dance was up, and it was a small piece from the Nutcracker. I was the star, and although I knew I deserved it, hate spawned around me.
 
The piece ended and I spotted Holly, Layla, and Amelie in the crowd, cheering me on. It made me smile as I bowed and exited.
 
The girls had been so nice here in Stockholm. Some I liked better than others, but none were horrible.
 
“How many times did you have to sleep with Thom?” Lily smirked.
 
Ugh. I hated her. She was a good ballerina, but her temper could be outright annoying. Plus, she could be so effortlessly sexy to anyone, and it made the crowd love her.
 
Girls were listening in as we sat in the dressing room, powdering our faces and preparing for the next dance.
 
“How many times to I have to tell you I didn’t?” I turned around and stared at her.
 
Lily rolled her eyes and faced her mirror again, but still looked at me.
 
“I’m just saying. It’s not like you deserve it.”
 
I shook my head and brushed her comments off. In ballet, people will do anything to undermine your confidence and break you down.
 
It was true, I hadn’t slept with him. Although, he had tried many times. I have been hit on and violated by him many times, but only once have I ever returned any note of affection. It was just when I was trying out for Black Swan. And I had to say, it worked, although it was just a small makeout session. Any other girl in the studio would have gone much farther, but I pride myself on my purity and dedication to ballet alone. I would much rather actually earn it.
 
I’d like to think my talent is what earns me that star role.
 
+++
 
After the show, I found Holly, Layla, and Amelie again in the crowd.
 
“What did you think?” I said, excitedly.
 
“It was amazing.” Holly smiled.
 
“Youre amazing!” Layla said it like she meant it.
 
“You deserve it!” Amelie gave me a big hug.
 
It warmed my heart to know they thought so. “Aw, thanks, you guys! Now can we get some drinks?”
 
Layla nodded eagerly. “Definitely.”
 
We headed to the bar, content and full of excitement.
 
We sat down at the stools and ordered our drinks. As I sipped my mimosa, Layla nudged me.
 
“There’s a man over there, staring at you.” She winked at me.
 
I looked up, cheeks flushed. Until I saw who it was.
 
Thom peered back at me, and gave me a suave little half-smile. He knew girls loved it. Amelie giggled.
 
“Uh, no. He’s bad news.” I looked away. “That’s….Thom. He’s been teaching me ballet for years, and has quite the reputation.”
 
“Come on, love. Let me buy you a drink.” Thom was now standing behind me, his hand on my lower back, in a suggestive way that made me feel uncomfortable.
 
“I’m good.” I said, coldly.
 
“Come on, Nina!” Holly said. Her eyes were wide. I knew if she were in my position, she would have accepted right away. Or said something cool and sexy. Holly was comfortable with that stuff. I wasn’t.
 
“I’ll buy another for each of you girls!” Thom threw his hand in the air, eager to please.
 
I rolled my eyes.
 
“Another of what each of these ladies are having, mate. And for me, another Black Russian.” Thom smiled at the bartender, who began mixing up more drinks.
 
I guess I did need to get drunk.
 
+++
 
comment and say something about russians if you read this far? thanks :)

[a few days early :P]
 
reminisce and say goodbye to the highs and lows of 2012 <3
 
im so grateful i made it another year! hug and kisses to all the loved ones who made it too. its no small feat!
 
get ready for another big one! 2013 here we come

i check my polyvore too often.

[so i am like the biggest loser and i made a chart with each character in i-d, who plays them, their biggest personality traits, and their relationship with nina. hehe. took me like a good hour.
 
if a relationship between nina and your character (friends, best friends, frenemies) hasnt really been defined yet, feel free to comment with one!
 
@paula-v and @thunder-dollfaycee, reserving joseph morgan as nina's ballet coach, thom :)
 
and FYI, i might be mentioning "lily" (her ballet rival) in some stories, who is played/modeled by mila kunis.
 
enjoy the story, ladies!]
 
THURSDAY 27
Camilla Norrback is having an intimate show for friends and press only at her atelier to give us a little preview of her next collection. Of course, we're all invited. Dress to impress because la crème de la crème will be there and you don't want to embarrass yourself.

++
 
I stared at the models with glimmering eyes. They were so…. Perfect. Shimmery silk dresses hung on their bodies like leaves on a willow tree. Bony arms swung as they danced down the runway.
 
Ugh, I thought.
 
My stomach churned- I hadn’t eaten since last night’s dinner, which comprised of a bowl of almonds and a few grapes. Looking at the girls up on the stage motivated me, however. It pushed me to keep going. I loved these shows.
 
Plus, coming here was a nice way to get together with the girls. Some I had already met, and some were fresh faces.
 
As the stage lit up and the show ended, I clapped and stood up. My Valentino shoes pinched at my toes. Beauty is pain. I’ve learned that through enough ballet. I turned to Katniss and shook my head in disbelief.
 
“Those girls go through so much… but its so worth it.” I said. I was still in a trance from the show.
 
“I guess- It just looks so unnatural, though,” she said. Her hair was pulled into a loose bun and her makeup was airy, in a light, fresh way. She wasn’t usually this made up. I envied how carefree she could be about her looks, and how comfortable she was in her own skin.
 
My hair was in a bun as well, but as usual, mine was extremely tight. It was a satisfying and unexpectedly comfortable look for me. This way, I could feel that everything in place. I need control over how I look.
 
I saw Holly and Alex exiting a door near the stage, giggling and each holding a familiar-looking dress. They sauntered over to me.
 
“What have you two been up to?” I laughed.
 
“Not much. You know.” Holly smirked.
 
My lips creased into a smile and a faux laugh bubbled out of my lungs. Holly bothered me; she seemed so effortlessly wonderful.
 
“I’ll tell you about it later,” Alex winked. After a pause, she looked up at my bun. “What is that?”
 
Emphasis on the “is.”
 
I touched my hair. No strand loose, bun curled tightly, everything all right.
 
“What?” I said to her, puzzled.
 
She walked around me and quickly undid my hair, letting it fall to my shoulders. I felt it touching my neck and shivered.
 
“Loosen up,” she stated.
 
I sucked in a big breath of the overly-perfumed air and combed through my caramel waves with my fingers. I needed to remember to let go, even though every inch of my body was screeching at me to fix it. I came to Stockholm to change myself, not to forever dwindle in my ever-perfecting ways.
 
Holly and Alex spotted some man that they apparently recognized and burst into laughter.
 
“Sorry girl, we gotta sprint!” Alex shrieked.
 
They ran to the exit. I hesitated at first, but followed as soon as I heard the man shout.
 
A little adventure never really hurt, now did it?

i miss making dolls! i luhh dem. :)
+ one of my favorite models. aagh. love her.